Name/Username: Maria and idk
Age: 15
Country: Ireland
ED: Bulimia
History of ED (how it started, how long you've had it, and how you feel about it at this point): idk how it started, had it for 2 years and at this point i dont know how i should feel about it.
What you're hoping to get out of this community: People who understand me.
Anything else you'd like to tell us: I have a dog =]

Fit.Schooled. And Fab

Ok im putting my foot down. Starting monday. Eating healthy,exersie. I did that before and lost 20 pds. I was so happy. But i have a feeling now that my mom never wants me to be skinny. I think she was jealous and got me back on the whole junk food shit. Then i felt bad and would nothing for days,some how my mind takes over and i binge. Its a huge cycle. I want to be healthy and happy. Im not going to let anyone in my way. I just dont want to keep this up. It will hit me in the long run. I want to be toned but not too much. I want to be healthy. This is bad for me mentally and physically. Im goning to do kick boxing(which helps relive stress) and walk on our treadmill. I just can't breath any more. I want to be able to breath again...Im not going to let my moms poor eatting habits effect my eating habits.

<3 Amber
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    London Beckoned Songs About Money Written by Machines-Panic at the disco

Sleep [cross-posted].

I'd like to hear about everyone's sleep patterns. I think that I've gotten worse with obsessing over food and losing weight and it's affected my sleep schedule. The earliest I go to bed anymore is around five or five-thirty but I also stay awake as late [early?] as eight a.m. and while it's been fine for the summer, I can't really live like this come September. I've tried reading, drinking herbal tea, exhausting my body, things like that. Smoking pot works, but I'm kind of looking for something else.

Anyway, I was wondering how those of you with similar problems cope? Herbal therapy, prescription meds, etc. Please let me know.

ok wow

Ok. Lemme break it down. I hate this. What i've become. The fasting the bingeing and fasting again.It's sicking. It's not healthy and either way im not happy. I tired on my clothes i bought the other day I look awful.A big bulgde of fat hangs over my size 8 Jeans. (Ok well its not huge but to be its not acpetable.)I've let my self go! I rember in 8th grade i lost so much weight,in the healthy way(diet and exsersie.) and i was so happy. But then summer rolled along and my dad come home for the summer and i started eating fatty foods again. Then once school started again i started counting cals and fasting i would feel so good. So then id binge. And about ten mins after i feel bad. 
My dad stresses my puts alot but i think im the one who puts the most stress on myself. I think "Oh,ill do better tommrow." I get upset and binge until a monday or saturday rolls around fast for 3 days and on the 4th i think"Hmmm i did really well ill eat a little something" and end up bingeing again. I get upset and the whole thing starts all over again. 
I cant take it anymore. I want to be happy and healthy. I eat junk food and it does nothing but make me fell like crap and depressed. And i really dont want to have to take my Zoloft to make me better. I just want to feel good about my self again!
I dont think Socitiy and "Thin is in" did it to me, i did this to my self. All the 'fat' that is on me reminds me why im depressed. and why i need to be healthy. I just want to be at a healthy weight. I dont want to be stick thin(not anymore i dont) I want to enjoy life,cause being upset about my weight is wasting my time! I wanted control over my eatting when in reality it took control over me. And i just want to look in the mirror and be happy. And yeah i know we all look in the mirror and sometimes think 'eww!' but life is to short to be worrying about how you look. And im not talking about makeup im talking about being thin. I guess what im trying to say is ,is that i love my body and i dont want to harm it anymore. Im going to work out and eat healthy.I want to be confident and happy!!!!

Srry i was uber ranting but i have been holding this in for months....

 Love Amber

X-Posted to meh journal

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    Mamma Mia-ABBA


Ashlee Simpson

1.She is a faveorite because she has struggled with her weight and trying to figure out who she is.
2. I think she looks amazing.Even thought shes having Pete's baby,she looks fabulous.
3. I think she looks amazing at any weight.
4.Yes becuase she kicks ass. She doesnt care what other people think. She does everything that she does for herself.
5.Yeah i do,her weight and mine goes up and down. And i think the both of us are confused. 

Audrey Hepburn
1. Wel she is my second favorite,but she was in ballet before she started acting and like me she was influence by ballet,having to be thin was a big thing,
2. Well,shes dead...(R.I.P) But i saw pictures of her and she looked fabulous as she always did.
3. At her heighest weight (when she first started) she was a litte different.She was only like what,my age?At her lowest she looked good!
4. Yes,yes,yes.She was an amazing acttress and she was so fashionable. She really didn't put her clothes together from what other people where wearing,she made her own style.
5. Yeah,i can.She was confused with eatting and thouht she was fat,when she was a twig! I think its just how we let society influence us.


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    Ayer-Flo Rida

Food For Thought...

The following are a list of famous women that battled ED's. Pick your "favorite" from the list. If you have a "favorite" that's not on the list, you're welcoem to use her. Then answer the following questions.

1. Why is she your "favorite"?
2. What do you think of her at her current weight?
3. What was your opinion of her when she was at her lowest weight? Highest weight?
4. Do you think she is a good influence on the youth of today? Why/Why not?
5. can you relate to her as far as eating habits, etc are concerned? If not, which celebrity can you relate to? How?

Collapse )

this is by no means necessary, but we figured it'd be interesting.
enjoy ladies!


your favorite mods:
taintedxtulip and oneclandestine
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    Ana's Song- Silverchair